Thursday, June 25, 2015

Memo from Paris for NSW Premier Mike Baird

Dear Mike,
I am giving up writing to Duncan - he doesn't get back to me, and ...

... well to be frank, he just isn't up to the task anyway.

Seriously it's just pure folly to carry on in the 'pork-chop' manner that he does, and he's doing nothing for Sydney or Sydney's transport or for our international standing amongst global transport leaders.

I have just been to Velo City 2015 in Nantes (you know what that is, don't you - that would just be too too embarrassing if you didn't) ... clue ... biggest urban and transport bicycle conference in the world ... (jeez)

Anyhoo, I can inform you that we are the laughing stock of this very large and influential world of 'using a bicycle.'

Delegates and speakers guffawed raucously when we lined up our transport plans against theirs - I mean just picture:

"Howdy we're putting in cycle lanes so that yo'all can go ahead and have a nice time using a bicycle in our country"


"G'day, we're ripping them up cos if you're planning on using a pushbike in our place, you've got rocks in your heads"

... too humiliating.

... and not a good look!

And everyone, just everyone knows Duncan ... and talks about him - I mean fancy the world knowing the name of one of our states' transport ministers - too weird - just shows you the abundant material he provides as a transport clown - so incredibly cringeworthy

Seriously he's got to go - global cities aren't weighing themselves down with his sort of a roads minister.

They're thinking big and radical.

They're thinking drastic and remedial because they're thinking that no-one can afford to dodge the pollution equation anymore, and they're thinking that cars are inescapably are part of that problem and that problem needs fixing.

That's what they're thinking ... but not our roads minister!

He's busy deleting cycleways and inserting motorways to solve our congestion problem ...

Duncan's dated like doughnuts ... and you need to do something about him - sack him perhaps.


  1. I was happy to see your Parisian interlude, but my, the water is murky in Parc des Buttes-Chaumont!