Uniquely Australian Phobia - the Bicycle

(Photos: Amsterdamize, Flickr, Royal Cyclery)


The idea of Australian bicycle safety has depended on all kinds of special effects that by definition contain a whiff of complete ridiculousness. It's the job of serious Bicycle NSW-types & the like to erase any trace of this ridiculousness and thus we get to observe the theatre of Australian cycling advocates underwriting scripts & props to "Danger Zone - The Bicycle".

Fascinatingly, we see that they have their own language and their own costumes and even their own special architect-designed bicycles which weigh less than meringues. But you don't have to scratch the surface very deep to expose the uncontainable whiff of 'Boys' Own Adventure World Ridiculousness'.

Why don't they do us all a favour & find themselves a truly scary pastime!!!

Cycling isn't dangerous: it's for everyone - aka from grannies to babies!!!!

Always has been, always will be!

Grow up, fellas!

Obstruction, your honour!

๏̯̃๏ Why is 'what's-on-your-head' more noteworthy than 'what's-in-your-lane'?

๏̯̃๏ Why do mandatory helmet law promoters refuse to admit the benefits of regulatory correction?

๏̯̃๏ Why are mandatory helmet law promoters constantly sheltered from criticism?

๏̯̃๏ Why are well-intentioned people rendered incapable of thinking rationally?

๏̯̃๏ Why does the ACCC oversee enforceable standards for adults but not for under four year olds?

--------------------OIL--------------------

Most of us are familiar with the notion that extinction is the natural companion to evolution but did Australian politicians ever consider that mass extinction could be a very dangerous activity? - hmmmn, maybe they did?!...

'Alas, poor bicycle users, we loved thee well!'

(Exit stage left, humming wistfully)

'Don't it always seem to go, that you don't know what you've got till it's gone...'

Baby No.2's Court Date Vacated

Yes 'tis true - the policeman can't make it tomorrow!!!

Ok, so no worries, quick little reshuffle of expert witness(es), journo(s), exams - & yay! bob's your uncle, everyone will be there come Friday 18th Novomber 2011...

...with bells on, of course(?!!!)

Take me back to dear old Yamba!

Immanency of ecological catastrophe that our 5-Planet lifestyle has incurred, compels me to ride my bicycle at all times whenever I can.

Reasonable belief of cerebral catastrophe that could be incurred in the unlikely event of me falling off my bicycle, compels me to ride my bicycle without a helmet at all times full stop.

It's that simple - why is this a problem, Australia?

Bicycle Poster Drinkie-Poos

Tonight's Agenda:

♥ quick little Proseco at Wine Library

♥ coast whole way down Oxford Street

♥ across Taylor Square & over fountain sprays, hoping they won't turn on

♥ straight through lights, bending left

♥ continue coast down Bourke Street

♥ mad little left at Fitzroy Street

♥ leisurely Sauvignon Blanc at Somedays Gallery

♥ soak up elegance of Bicycle Film Festival & romantic bicycle art installation...

♥...as well as continued cosy karma from finding phone left by me on back of 'mon velo' in Oxford Street during quick little Proseco moment!!!!

Bliss

Sydney plays 'we ♥ bicycles' while New Zealand mops-up

Machine & muse(os)


Bundles of bikes


'I-bicycle-as-I-find-me' Sarah Wilson


'Sassy-Chic'

We frolicked in the park at breakfast with our bicycles hitched to abudant though temporary bicycle infrastructure - & how lovely it was...

...but let us not forget the terrible price our menacing Car & Oil Culture continues to exact on the planet - this time in New Zealand and the beautiful Bay of Plenty - shame on us all

Mandatory Floaties Law anyone?

Baby No.3 nearly choked on his beer & prawns when I issued my "anyone-who-takes-a-dip-in-the-surf-ought-to-have-to-wear-floaties-whether-they-can-swim-or-not-&-whether-they-like-it-or-not" pronouncement!!!!

'Muuuummmm! WTF! No way!' he protested 'what's wrong with you - that's as dumb as helmets...'

'...ha! ha! ha!'

'You're not funny'

Needless to mention I think I'm hilarious (!) but I'm also acutely aware that a nation of surfies would no more trust floaties to provide water-safety than a nation of bicycle-users would trust helmets to provide road-safety!

It's a question of what frightens you - & clearly Australians are NOT frightened of rips or sharks or 4 metre swells or blue-bottley-Portuguese-men-of-war or even crocodiles...

...only of bicycles (sigh)